A Single Rose

Back on January 31, 2010, Tiffany and I went out to visit Lonnie's grave site. A single rose with a rosary had been placed there. I don't know who left it but it touched my heart and I am thankful for the friends I know and those I do not know who love our Lonnie. A couple of days later, I was talking to Jason and he mentioned that one of his and Sunnie's friends had written a tribute in Lonnie's honor and had given it to them. He read it to me over the phone and also sent me a copy:

A Single Rose Fell

by Jaclyn Heistand

My bare feet step upon the cement with assurance. Heat from the sidewalk radiates through my skin, warm enough to keep my stride from lulling. It feels good. I feel good.

I walk with confidence. Hope is my guide, and I am running on faith. With my head lifted, I walk.

Don't be fooled, for it isn't pride that I wear, but a sure confidence in Christ. This is how it is.

Then...it happens, that as I walk, something comes to lay in my path. It is, that as I step, I come along a single yellow rose in the middle of the sidewalk.

I stop. I peer down, and I stare at the rose.

I am unaware of my knees bending. I am unaware of my strength leaving me. I am unaware of the heat biting my feet. The ground beneath me shakes suddenly and quickly I fall to the walk. It is also, for a moment, that I fall from that place of assurance.

With my palms on the cement, I steady myself.

The yellow rose is still there. I ponder that rose. The tarnish of age has not yet touched its petals. The blossom lay open in its full display of beauty. I look for its purpose there and cannot find any, but only as if it fell lonely and alone from off the bush that bore it. My eyes dart around, looking for the bush, and it is there. With other yellow blossoms leaning in my direction.

No, they were leaning towards the rose. Truly? Were they bowing?

I stare at the scene in front of me. This one beautiful rose, alone, and now gone with no life, fallen apart from where it belonged. And the others, still left, bowing down in mourning.

My heart aches in what I cannot change, and in what I cannot do, and in what I now miss. What a fall I have taken as I mourn. My stride is no more. I now sink deeper into the ground, my head bowed.

I cry out for my hope, for my blessed assurance. And He hears me. And I feel His tears fall upon me even as I am held.

Forever I will ponder on the life of that rose and certainly in its end. I seek now to walk again. I stand slowly, my legs tremble. I don't want to lift my head, but I do.

Cautiously, my foot steps forward.

(When Jason read the title to me, in my mind's eye, I immediately pictured a red rose. How remarkable that the flower we found just two days prior was a yellow rose placed there by someone who knew and loves Lonnie and at the same time someone on the other side of the country who had never met him would write about a yellow rose and honor our Lonnie in such a loving, heartfelt way).

Our Father is holding us in His hands and is walking with us as we take each step moving forward......and we know our Lonnie has moved forward to be with Him in heaven......just a breath away!

We can see his smiling face even now....and remember the many times when he sang praise to our Lord here on earth including the words "blessed assurance, Jesus is mine." (Another thing our new friend in Washington did not know....Lonnie's favorite hymn was Blessed Assurance.)

So thankful for that blessed assurance and we join you, Lonnie, in "praising our Savior all the day long."